Growing Pangs: Living Life in Community

The Guidry's right before they said their final "See Ya Laters."

Today my two favorite sailors Jon and Ty (who also happen to be identical twin brothers) boarded the aircraft carrier USS John C. Stennis and departed from Naval Base Kitsap for deployment in the Western Pacific Ocean.  They will spend the next seven months "or so" patrolling the Western Pacific Ocean, before they return home.

I'm so proud of them.  And I've been crying big crocodile momma tears all day long.

Wanna know the odd thing?

I really don't even know Jon and Ty that well.  When we became friends with their Mom and Dad, they were midway through their senior year, preparing to graduate and join the Navy.  Our direct interactions with Jon and Ty have been relatively limited, but I love them both and feel like I've known them forever.

Why?

Because we started doing life with their family.  Real, authentic, vulnerable community.  The kind where you can drop in unannounced, jump into whatever the family is doing at the moment, and it's okay.

We've unpacked each other's groceries.  Carpooled.  Cheered each other's kids on at their sporting events. Shared meals - planned and unplanned. Cried together.  Laughed together.  Prayed together.  Celebrated each other's success.  Wept over each other's grief.  And the Group Text.  Oh man...  When it gets rolling, the fun (and the messages) never stops.

The community we've built is the kind where you can be honest about your highs and your lows.  No pretending.  Just real.  It's beautiful and vulnerable.  Sometimes that vulnerability is a little uncomfortable, but in a good way.

I'm not a Crier.  Never really have been.  Crying makes me feel exposed and uncomfortable.  But I woke up this morning with a heavy burden of grief.  I knew the Guidry's were in Washington waiting with a mixture of sadness and pride for their boys to board that aircraft carrier and watch it sail away.

Sailing away

Jon and Ty will be gone for almost ten months.  It's the longest the Guidry's have ever gone without seeing each other.  Jon and Ty will be somewhere in the Western Pacific when their only sister Lauren - who they openly adore - graduates from high school.  And their little brother Ethan?  Well he's halfway through a year of giant change: new town, new middle school, new friends - without his big brothers to come home to every day.  This is tough.

I know sailors depart from port routinely.  Every day families in our country wave goodbye to their sons, their daughters, their moms, and their dads while these heroes go off and defend our freedom and our country. It is brave and courageous.  I love the United States and stand in awe of what each of these families sacrifices day in and day out so I can live in freedom.

Today is different though. Two of those sailors manning the rails are faces I know. Faces I have come to love because their family loves them so well.

Photo session before the left for bootcamp

This family prays for each other.

My momma's heart is full of pride for the men they have become.  Pride for the courage they have.  Pride that they are serving our country and securing my freedom.  Excitement for all the cool adventures ahead of them.  Joy that they get to experience this together on the same ship. And grief for their family who is encountering the growing pangs of letting them become men.

And so the Non-Crier has spent the better part of today with tears freely flowing down my cheeks.  Tears of pride.  Tears of sadness.  Tears of "Wow! This is the goal of mothering.  To raise up kids who can be confident adults and go off and change the world."

It feels odd.  It feels uncomfortable.  But it feels right.  Life lived in community is rich and deep and I wouldn't change a thing.

Ty brought me a NAVY sweatshirt from the commissary.  I plan to wear it a lot, not just because it's cool, but because it reminds me to pray for these two sailors who are out changing their world.

Well done Al and Cyndi.  Your boys are men.  Good men.  Be proud.

Jon and Ty... know how loved you are.  Not just by your family but by an entire army of people who love your family.  We are praying for you and so excited to hear about all your grand adventures.

Be safe.  God is with you.

Hooyah.

S L O W D O W N....

Yoga is a hard practice for me.  Why?  Because if you want to do it well and experience the full benefit of your practice you can't do it fast.

Anyone who knows me, knows I can't sit still.  EVER. Give me a list a mile long and a short time to do it and  I thrive under the pressure and the chaos.  It's why life as a business owner with four kids, two dogs, a husband in grad school, and a commitment to run every day usually feels full, but only sometimes overwhelming.  Taking time to BE STILL is hard for me.

The problem with a fast-paced, on the go 24-7 lifestyle is that it's counterintuitive to how we're created.  God created us for regular rhythms of rest.  We must create space to stop. Pause. Breathe in.  Breathe out.

S L O W  D O W N....

I'm racing a half marathon on Sunday and am supposed to be resting this week.  Yoga is a no-brainer for a rest week, but I talked myself out of it every day so far this week.  Who can slow down for an entire hour when there is work to be done, shopping to finish, presents to wrap, and Christmas cards to send out?

Yesterday I received the Christmas cards I ordered last week.  I was in such a hurry to get the cards ordered that I uploaded the low resolution version of the picture we wanted to use so... The Professional Photographer's Christmas photo is highly pixilated.  I am trying to see the ironic humor in it and not hyperventilate.

This morning on my run I realized I completely, 100% forgot my niece's birthday.  No card. No phone call.  No present. No remembering it was even her birthday until today - FIVE days after the fact.  Could I be any lamer?

The hustle and bustle of the Christmas season has officially taken it's toll.

Enough is enough.

Yoga forces me to stop the madness and just be.  It was time for a yoga session.

I got out my yoga mat. Lit my Christmas candle.  Turned on the fire. Then spent an hour stretching and meditating.

Inhale. Exhale.

Calm the chaos inside my brain.

S L O W  D O W N....

That one hour of yoga refreshed my spirit and my mind, adding new depth and perspective to this Christmas season.  After all this is the season of Advent - a reminder to anticipate Jesus' coming. There is beauty in the quiet stillness and I experienced that today.

If you feel frazzled and overwhelmed, I encourage you to take an hour to quiet your mind and be still.  You won't regret it.

Namaste.

Never Underestimate What Kids Who Are Willing to Work Hard Can Do: Newberg Water Polo State Champions 2015

When we moved to Newberg, Oregon, Grant was going into 2nd grade.  That kid was like a fish and could hold his breath forever.  We couldn't keep him out of the water.  I have an unnatural fear of drowning and am a nervous wreck when my kids are around water so I registered the kids in swim lessons.  The walls at the pool were covered with boards touting one water polo state championship after another.  It never once crossed my mind to consider this sport for my family.  But God had other plans.

My Future Stuntman at age 10, when he first started playing water polo.

Grant insisted on trying water polo.  The spring of his fourth grade year, he and his two buddies Dane and Raleigh signed up.  Watching them play - even at an elementary level - scared me half to death.  I couldn't believe all the shoving/drowning/pushing was legal.  It was like a living nightmare for me, but Grant LOVED it. I would have to get over my fear of him drowning because this kid was made for water polo.

Water polo is co-ed until high school.  Grant, Dane, Raleigh, Zach, Wilson, Mackenzie and Hannah all grew up together in the pool. We watched them graduate from the shallow, short end of the pool where they could touch if they got tired to the full-length, deep end that required continual treading of water and non-stop swimming.  They swam their little pre-adolescent bodies up and down the pool proving they were indeed capable of playing this grueling sport without drowning. They got stronger and faster almost overnight.

The boys when they started playing water polo: Left to Right (Caleb - not a polo player), Grant, (Alden - not a polo player), Raleigh and Dane.

Newberg's water polo program is all about community.  The older, more experienced kids help coach and train the younger kids coming up through the system.  Families work together to raise money to pay for club fees.  We cheer on each other's kiddos, volunteer at home tournaments, travel together to away tournaments, and host potlucks for team dinners. When you continually rub shoulders, strangers melt into friends.  Friends begin feel like family.  You can't put a price tag on what we share.

Jim McMaster is legendary when it comes to Newberg water polo.  He's been coaching the teams for years and led them to one state title after another.  Jim expects the kids to show up, work hard, be respectful, work hard, be nice to each other, work hard (have I mentioned that yet?), and exhibit good sportsmanship.  He has high expectations and holds the kids accountable to them.  No surprise - they step up and meet the bar.

Coaching the boys through the state championship game

This year Grant and his friends are freshmen.  The girls split off to their own team and the Freshmen Five moved on to a boys high school team that graduated their entire starting line up, minus two.  Everyone agreed this would be a re-building year for the boy's team.

Conditioning (in two hour segments times five days a week) started in mid-August.  The following week, the kids moved into Daily Doubles.  Practice started early (6:30 a.m.) and usually consumed five hours of each day.  That didn't include the ten miles per day of biking Grant, Dane and Raleigh rode to and from practices.  It was intense, but Grant never once complained. He loved the challenge, the discipline, and the muscles that quickly emerged. When school started, practice was six days a week.  After home games, Coach Jim has the boys do a full swim set.  These kids are in the best shape of their lives!

Fast forward five years and this is what those "little boys" look like now. 

Lots of hours spent carpooling with these hooligans.  I love them all like they're my own.  That's me, Grant, Dane and Raleigh after the district tournament.

Coach Jim is a great judge of talent and has vision for how to sculpt his team.  He knows when to push the kids harder and when to give them a break.  He definitely lets them know when they screw up, but he also has frequent words of praise for a job well done. During games he often paces the pool deck yelling out plays and instructions.  The kids know to listen for his voice and do what he says.  They respect him and it shows.

Last year the Newberg High School boys won the 6A state title against arch rival Southridge with a powerhouse lineup of mostly seniors. No one thought the boys had a chance at repeating as state champions.

Never underestimate what a crowd of kids who are willing to work hard can do.  

A team heavy with freshmen showed up this season ready to play and hungry to win.  They had something to prove. Wilson was the starting varsity goalie while Dane and Zach started in the field.  Raleigh was first off the bench with Grant following.

The older boys were incredible. If they were frustrated about having such young players, they never showed it.  Instead they poured into their new teammates - working hard in the early weeks to gel as a team and making all the boys feel like they were part of something bigger than themselves.  They were Newberg Nation.

In the pre-season the boys lost a nail-biter to a bigger, older Barlow team, losing by one goal.  It lit a fire under them and they didn't lose again to an Oregon team the entire season! Our boys entered the 6A Oregon state water polo championship tournament undefeated in league play! No one predicted that.

The boys won their way through the state tournament to the championship game.  Guess who they matched up against?  Barlow.  The only Oregon team to hand them a loss this season.

Team Photo after the won the state semi-finals game and earned a spot in the championship game.

To add to the drama, our girls team went undefeated all season as well.  Their roster was the opposite of the boys - top heavy with seniors who were playing their last games together at the state tournament with only Hannah and Mackenzie representing the freshmen class.   In a crazy twist of fate, the girls also were matched up against Barlow in the championship game. A big showdown between two great programs was in store.

Our boys came out strong, scoring four quick goals to end the first quarter 4-0.  Barlow played hard, but our boys never let them get close.  We won the state championship match 14-5!  When the All Tournament Team was announced, Wilson made the First Team -as a Freshman.  His teammates and the parents in the crowd went crazy. In fact five of our seven starters worked their way onto the All Tournament teams, with Tyler Bell earning the MVP.  It was magical.

Team Captains retrieving the trophy

2015 6A State Champions!

Look at Wilson's team celebrating when they announced he was the First Team All Tournament Goalie.

The girls game was the complete opposite.  Barlow came out strong, scoring three goals before we scored one.  The score at the half was 2-5 in Barlow's favor. Our girls played fierce defense against an equally fierce Barlow team and slowly but surely battled back, tying the game then going ahead by one in the fourth quarter.  The score was 6-5 in Newberg's favor with thirty-three seconds left when Barlow scored to send the game into overtime.  It came down to conditioning and our girls wore down Barlow, scoring three goals in the last three minutes to win the state title 9-6.  It was INTENSE and EXCITING.  Four of the Newberg Girls team players also earned spots on the All Tournament Team.  I'm still trying to come down off the adrenaline high!

Girls 6A State Champions 2015

WELL DONE BOYS AND GIRLS!  You make us all so proud.  I can't wait for next year.

#newbergnation #gotigers #waterpoloisnotforwimps #statechampions

You know I can't end this post without drawing a parallel to life.

So often we face challenges that seem insurmountable.  There appears to be no way out, around or through.  Well intentioned people may even be saying, "It's a rebuilding season. Don't plan to be successful."   Can I encourage you to not give up?

Keep showing up every day.

Get out of bed.  Sometimes that alone is a victory.

Choose joy in the face of heartache.

Hold tight to Jesus' hand.

Work hard.

Press in.

Don't quit.

You will get through this.  And you'll make yourself and everyone who loves you proud in the process.

#lifelessonsfromsports #yourewelcome #lifeisnotforwimps

Olallie Lake - The Best Accidental Camping Trip of Our Life

Our "summer" was short.  Curt was in doctoral school and Grant and Alli were both playing water polo through mid-July. Grant resumed water polo in the second week of August, so our family only had a three week window of unplanned, summer days and open weekends.

The first weekend Grant, Katie and Alli were away at church camp leaving Curt, Paige, and me all by ourselves.  We loaded up our dogs and drove to Central Oregon to go camping.  We didn't have a reservation, but we stumbled upon a pretty campsite in the West South Twin Lake Campground.  Paige didn't get bored until the last day and we loved having her to ourselves.

Happy Church Campers

Happy Tent Campers

We hiked to South Sister Mirror Lake for a picnic lunch.

The following weekend Curt and I ran the Cascade Lakes Relay together.  It's a 216 mile relay race (split between twelve team members) that starts in Diamond Lake and finishes in Bend.  The entire race is run at elevation, through extreme temperatures, and a lot of altitude changes. Sounds crazy but it is a riot! My non-running husband "loved everything about it except the running."  He even agreed to do it again next year.

The Finish Line is so sweet.

Our third and final weekend of freedom was held for "CAMPING."  Curt normally chooses our camping weekends in January, researches campgrounds online, and reserves the Reservable Campsites the day they become available.  But this year was different.  We were on a What Needs to Happen Today basis.  There was no planning ahead, even for camping.  The Stilp Family is learning to wing it!

We all love Timothy Lake, a giant man-made lake in the heart of the Mt. Hood National Forest.  It boasts several campgrounds with big, private, beautiful sites and a thirteen mile trail around the perimeter of the lake.  I was salivating over the possibility of such a long trail run and the kids were anxious to get back to their favorite place to camp.  With so many campgrounds we were certain we could get a campsite, but we were wrong.

Gone Creek Campground - our favorite on Timothy Lake - was already full by 2 p.m. on Friday afternoon.  The campground host warned us that "every campground on the lake was full." We went to two more neighboring campgrounds - each further off the lake and deeper into the forest - with no luck.  Our Crew was restless and disappointed.

I have wanted to go to Olallie Lake since we moved to Oregon.  One of our friends painted vivid stories of the rugged beauty and the memories made camping there year after year as a child.  It sounded idyllic - a Must See in the land of beauty that is Oregon.  But Olallie Lake is remote - you really have to want to go there.

We were out of options in the Timothy Lake area so we drove 30+ miles of Forest Service Road to get to the Olallie Lake junction, where we drove another fifteen uphill miles to get to the Olallie Lake Scenic Area. Nine of those fifteen miles were on a gravel road through what appeared to be the middle of Nowhere.  Finally we came across a map of the area.  Seven campgrounds and even one resort dotted the map. We had hope again.

The first two campgrounds weren't open. We kept driving to the "resort" which was really a smattering of tiny red cabins on the edge of one of the most beautiful mountain lakes I have ever seen.  Mt. Jefferson - majestic and glorious - guarded the lake, while backpackers hiking the Pacific Crest Trail sat on the edge of the road reading and catching their breath.  It was like something straight out of a movie.

We talked to some hikers who assured us that a plethora of open campsites awaited us at Peninsula campground - another two miles around the lake and deeper into the wilderness.  They were right.  We scored a giant, private campsite right on the water's edge.  We had to park and pack all our stuff in about 1/4 of a mile from our car but it was well worth it because we pitched our tent right on the beach! Olallie Butte - the other prominent feature of the area - was directly across from our tent, beckoning us to come and explore.

first night sitting in our camp chairs.

that Olallie Butte and our tent on the beach. Plus my handsome men.

Katie (way in the distance on that log) exploring as the sun sets on that burned out area.

Sunset as seen from my camp chair.

There was a campfire ban so we met on the fishing dock to roast marshmallows over a propane fire, courtesy of the Resort staff.

Our tent - lit only by headlamps and the brilliant stars.

view from my cot inside the tent.

Our campground matched the surrounding wilderness: bare bones and rugged.  There was no potable water and only a few scattered pit toilets, but we liked it like that.  It had the rugged feel of backpacking without all the work.

Mornings on the peninsula were calm - quiet, smooth water with no hint of wind. But every afternoon, the water began to ripple and the wind began to stir.  It slowly increased to a steady hum in the tree tops that stayed throughout the entire night.  We retired early one night to our tent, all cozied in our sleeping bags listening to the wind and playing cards by the light of our headlamps.  It was just what our family needed.

Alli playing on Curt's phone

Paige - headlamp on the tent.

Katie being awesome.

Grant and Kimber snuggling.

The Pacific Crest Trail (PCT) - a hiking trail that starts in Mexico and finishes in Canada, goes right through the Olallie Lakes Scenic Area.  The trail junction was a mere 2 miles from our campsite. and we HAD to say we hiked the PCT. We hiked the trail three miles to Upper Lake - a scenic, quiet alpine lake that we had entirely to ourselves.  It was magical!

The PCT is marked with these signs on trees along the way.

happy Dusty

bathing in a snow melt alpine lake is FRIGID.  Here I am at Upper Lake trying to warm up on the sun soaked rock.

Oh Dusty - we love you.

Kimber and Grant - always in the lead.

Paigey about to give Kimber a treat.  Look at Dusty waiting too.

My Loves on the PCT - that's Mt. Jefferson.  Isn't she lovely?

We could have stayed a week in our paradise on the water's edge, but life forced us to pack up and come home.  Olallie Lake was THE BEST accidental camping trip of our life.  We will 100% be back again.  Thank you Jesus for teaching us to wing it and leading us to the perfect spot to unplug, unwind, and rest. We all agree these were the best three days of our summer.

the morning we left

That's a LOT of stuff to pack back up and out to the car.